Showing posts with label beach. Show all posts
Showing posts with label beach. Show all posts

Friday, February 1, 2013

ebb and flow

When it rains (snows)... it pours.

I have 4 big projects with deadlines that somehow all seemed to merge into the same week. Next week, to be exact.

I've come to realize that there is an ebb and flow to everything. Like last week, I think I posted 3 times on this blog. This week, zero, until today. Since this blog is more for a creative outlet and space for random musings, I don't hold myself to any particular number as far as frequency of writing here.

Or one week, I might walk some, practice yoga, try an online barre3 video. On another week, I may not have the energy for anything else but yoga.

Or, I might spend a whole afternoon cooking and baking up a storm (I like how Faith calls it a "kitchen rampage"). Then a week later, I just want takeout, when the only effort I can muster goes into opening the bag of food.

It's true with work as well. Some weeks are better than others. Some weeks, I feel like I have it all together and other weeks, I ask myself, "what the heck am I doing???"

I've come to realize that the balance also comes from being ok with this ebb and flow. Accepting what is.

Because it's all a matter of perspective. Or so I remind myself, when the anxiety hits. Life is never perfect. We'll never "reach" that so-called perfectly balanced state. I don't think it's a balanced state as much as it is a balanced perspective.

It's balancing the expectation of the task with my knowledge of myself. Not this lopsided view of overestimating the task and underestimating my abilities, as I tend to do.

Boracay, Philippines | December 2012

As I sit here watching the infamous "lake effect" snow fall outside my window, I am reminded of my time at the beach in the Philippines this past December and January. The ebb and flow of the tide, and how soothing it was in its rhythm.

I remember inhaling and exhaling with this ebb and flow, feeling this sense of calm just wash over me with every gentle wave that laps at the shore. Aaaahhh. The magic of the ocean.

But without this beloved tropical beach outside my door, I rely on my breathing once more. I visualize the steadiness of the tide.

And slowly, with the ebb and flow of my own breathing, I notice my heartbeat is no longer racing. My jaws loosen. My shoulders start to relax away from my ears, bit by bit.

Somehow, my breathing also silences the inner critic, and I find hidden underneath the anxiety is a source of energy and wisdom. 

And that was my short-but-sweet five-minute yoga practice. 



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Sunday, January 13, 2013

Manila (Philippines) on my mind

Aaaand we're back.

I have so much to write about, but my thoughts are still in random snippets of words and images. Images that may or may not have made it into my camera, but rather images stored in my mind. Sensations, emotions, and thoughts that are not quite coherent yet.

About how traveling reminds me just how startlingly beautiful this world is.

The colors of the sky viewed from the window of the airplane... God's brushstrokes on his infinite canvas.

The endless expanse of varying shades of blue, the perfection of sea meeting sky. The magic of a sandbar - a narrow strip of white sand which, for a few fleeting hours, felt like our own private island before it disappeared into the water.

The dewy scent of the lush tropical garden in my parents' home, the home where I grew up. If green had a scent, this would be it.

The almost intoxicating fragrance of a ripe Philippine mango, which I ate everyday like it was a gift.

The genuine embrace from the little arms of a 4-year-old.

The warmth of my mother's hands... though they look different, they feel exactly the same to me as they did 25 or 15 or 5 years ago.

Reuniting with childhood friends... picking up where we left off as though no time has passed. And noticing how we laugh just like our teenage selves did many years ago, but we speak with more wisdom and maturity.

The comforting feeling of HOME. Of FAMILY. Of shared meals, memories, and yes, dare I say even the notorious Manila traffic jam.

...Ok, maybe not the Manila traffic.

sandbar off the coast of Cebu | photo by my brother Carlo


I've still got sand in my shoes
And I can't shake the thought of you

- Dido

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