I'm going through a little craziness this week. Much of it is my own doing (as usual... still trying to master Covey's time management matrix), but I'm really feeling the effects of my misguided prioritizing.
But enough with the guilt - it does not really help the situation.
I felt the anxiety creeping up on me again today. I now recognize the warning signs: tension in my shoulders and neck, tightness in my chest, shortness of breath (despite not doing anything vigorous or remotely physical).
First I started pacing around the apartment.
Then I started trying to go through my stacks of papers and other things to read. Didn't help either.
I resisted the urge to stress-eat my way through my Vosges Haut Chocolat Black Salt Caramel dark chocolate. (Ok, I did eat a small piece though.)
I ignored (with difficulty) the urge to stress-cook.
And then I came across these words: meet resistance with ease.
(Imagine light bulb turning on here)
So I came back to the most natural, yet sometimes most difficult thing to do: BREATHE.
I sat on a chair so I can support my back and shoulders, closed my eyes, and breathed.
At first it was challenging - with the many deadlines and tasks swirling around in my brain. I almost gave up, thinking, "I should use all the precious minutes I have today to work." But I decided to sit with it for a while.
I used the sound of my breath to drown my thoughts, and focused on listening to its sound. It was almost like white noise; steady and soothing. I realized the ease with which I can breathe. And I came back to what I knew all along: I CAN calm my mind. I CAN calm my nerves.
With every inhale I summoned my strengths and gifts to bring to my work.
With every exhale I visualized the weight slowly lifting from my shoulders and chest.
Meet resistance with ease...