September skies

There is nothing as refreshing as the colors of nature... especially the varying shades of green against a perfect blue sky.

"Breathing in, I am aware of the blue sky.
Breathing out, I smile to the blue sky."

- Thich Nhat Hanh

favorite things

The different forms of therapy, at least in my world:

Yoga...
and taking a different perspective.

A long walk.

The sound of water.

(or better yet, being in the water... but I'll be content with just listening to the sound of it for now)

A quiet reading corner.




Music.

(A musician playing the hammered dulcimer at a street art festival in Asheville, NC)

Random affirmations.

And of course, chocolate... in various forms.

Truffles from my favorite chocolate place, French Broad Chocolate Lounge, Asheville, NC.

(take note of the little card that reads: "a sacred space for chocophiles".)

Liquid truffle - an insanely good hot chocolate - from the same chocolate heaven, French Broad Chocolate Lounge.

(don't forget the shortbread for dipping)

Gelato cake from Dojo Gelato, Cincinnati

(Chocolate cake base from Take the Cake, chocolate gelato, and Kahlua-spiked cream.)

I feel better already.

striving for balance

Whew. As you can tell from my blogging disappearance, the last month and a half has been a whirlwind.

Packing.
Moving.
Starting school... again.
Enough said.

I've come to realize that for the past couple of months, my schedule has been so packed. The summer just passed me by, and all of a sudden I noticed that the days are already getting shorter and it's officially fall. I hardly swam or hiked or walked as much the way I used to in previous summers. Those things that give me balance have been missing.

Long walks.
Journaling.
Reading for pleasure.
Being in nature.
More yoga.
More movement.
More art.

No wonder I have not been in balance lately. I've been leading quite an unhealthy lifestyle... sitting at a computer for hours on end, sleeping at 2 in the morning.

I know that this is the life I chose for myself for the next few years. This is what it is. Get ready.

Don't get me wrong. Overall, I'm in a great place in my life. I thought I was doing well where I was, but I always new that I wanted more. And I don't mean that in a material sense. I mean "more" in terms of the stuff of dreams. Being in a state of restlessness because of the need to do, and be, "more".

And now it is here. I'm in a place of new growth. New opportunity. New challenges. It's actually exciting, to be learning so much, and growing. Such a great privilege, really. And when I really think about it, I am thankful to be in this place. My friend wrote about the good things in life vs the great things in life -- and letting go of the good things so that great things can happen. Maybe this is what is taking place in my life right now.

But it comes with a price.

Sometimes I wonder, should I be this tired? I'm only 30! I should be able to keep up with everything.... right? Or am I legitimately, justifiably tired?

I have to admit, I've always been busy. I like being busy. I've always packed my life with lots of things. Even during my down-time, I find myself making random projects like... making homemade hand cream. Or getting into these crazy cooking sprees, making insane amounts of food. But even as I fill my life with all these things, I get into a state of balance. They fulfill my need to be creative. To escape from the cerebral to the tactile and kinesthetic. To keep my hands busy so I can somehow unwind and clear my head. To be in that meditative zone.

How can I bring balance back into my life, when it feels like every waking minute is accounted for? Here I am, spending a few minutes on blogging and already I'm starting to feel like I should be doing something "more important".

Ok, that's enough of being Debbie Downer for right now. Meanwhile, I'll have to end here so I can wrap up for the night... and, if I'm lucky, maybe I'll go to sleep before 2 in the morning.

Take a deep breath. Tomorrow is another day.

transitions

Big changes coming up very soon...

I'm ready. For the most part. I'm about to do what I've been wanting to do. And the opportunity came up to allow me to do it. Still, big transitions can be nerve-wracking. Especially after calling a place home for 6 years, being in a fulfilling job for 4 out of those 6 years.

Am I crazy to be doing this? Am I crazy to give up a stable job in the health care industry in this economy? Am I crazy to embark on this big lifestyle change?

Maybe I am. And maybe that's a good thing.

"In a sky full of people
Only some want to fly
Isn't that crazy?
In a world full of people
Only some want to fly
Isn't that crazy?"

- Seal, "Crazy"

I'll definitely miss this city. It has given me so much - new friendships, new possibilities. Opportunities to dream, and dreams fulfilled. And I've found many, many happy places here. Places for art. Places for food. Places for peace and calm. Soon I'll be discovering a new city, looking for my new happy places. And that's a good thing.

stress-cooking

It's been almost a month since I've written on this blog. As much as I think writing is therapeutic, I have been stress-cooking for the past few weeks. I made enough to feed an army. The funny thing about it is, there have been many days in which I didn't even feel like eating. But I stress-cooked anyway. I call it culinary therapy. There's something about chopping vegetables, stirring, smelling, and watching ingredients come together. It's like an escape from the many thoughts and worries going through my head, as I do nothing else but slice, dice, and stir... while listening to the calming, rhythmic sound of the knife blade against the bamboo cutting board, smelling herbs and spices come together like magic.

So one weekend I made 3 Indian dishes and 2 batches of Vietnamese yogurt. Oh, and my own hand cream.

Perhaps my "happy homemaker" mood is giving me this grounding feeling which I need so badly in times of uncertainty.

Ode to the day

Ode to the day

When I sit in a coffee shop
Not wearing a watch,
Having meaningful conversation
With a new friend
About our religions,
How they complement each other.
Talking about the beautiful sustainability
Of the environment,
The fair governing
of all countries,
Love,
And how all children have food, clean water, and good
educations
Learning about first and third world classifications only in
textbooks.
Drinking coffee produced by a man whom we know
Has the same potential as we.

Might I make decisions today that allow me to believe
Tomorrow can be that day.

- Poetry by Ashley Boone,
published in EcoWatch Journal, April/May 2009


******

Perhaps this is the true meaning of Independence Day.
Happy Fourth of July!

"JUST GO."

...my inner voice said.

But when in doubt, I go back to these words of wisdom...

"One does not discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time." - Andre Gide
(Thanks, CRC, for sharing this quote with me before I left Manila in 2003.)

******

"Even paradise can grow too small
When you hear the far horizon's call
Other lands await."

- From Why Explore? (children's picture book by Susan Lendroth)

******

Manifest your must.
Pursue your passion.
Define your day.
Dare to dream.

- Mary Anne Radmacher

******

And, most recently, in a conversation with my neighbor while doing laundry, she said:

"Trust your instincts. Nine out of ten times, your instincts are right."

Wise lady.